Micah have been a known soccer player before his life (and leg) shattered together with his reputation when he was outed. Scared to deal with life totally and absolutely on his he rents a room in Sam's flat. For Sam it's help he needs considering he currently works at a bar and while he loves his job it doesn't pay as well as being a celebrity.. or ex-celebrity in Micah's case.
While they form a very comfortable routine, sharing meals and spending time together, they perfect the ability to talk without talking, getting to know each other without asking. Micah isn't the talkative guy to say the least and Sam can't bring himself to ask anything so reading the newspapers from "back then" is his only glimpse into who Micah is, or rather who he used to be. The quiet, closed off guy who sits at the bar on his weekends shifts, nursing a soft drink for no reason Sam can decipher.
There is solace in the life they built together. There is also love. One that neither feels like he can express to the other without losing what they already have.
Micah never had a friend like Sam, and he can't even imagine telling Sam what he feels considering how f-ed up his life is at the moment. His bum leg, the pills he needs to take to manage his mood together with a therapist who helps but there is still a long way to go... What can he really offer Sam? Beautiful caring Sam. Who feeds him and takes care of him and helps keeps him sane. For Sam, Micah is a big enigma on so many levels, yet he feels he knows him at heart, maybe like no one ever had. Being there for Micah. Sharing his company, making him go out, do the simplest things makes him happy. He can see the change from when Micah arrived at his house, spending the nights wide awake in the living room, dragging his leg from one end to the other. He loves the gentleness and quiet interest Micah shows in everything he does for him and while their friendship means the world to them, they both want MORE or at least wish it's something they could openly express. Like so many things left unsaid between them.
One in particular when Micah is unable to explain to Sam where he has disappeared for almost a day and Sam jumps to the wrong conclusions. Yet Micah is unable to correct him in his usual way of blaming himself for everything. For the guy he used to be, for Sam thinking he is still that guy, for being too proud to show his weakness, his pain and lack of control over too many things in his life. It breaks something in their friendship and only when Micah catches Sam is literally at the door with an overnight bag on his way to his parents things start to change. Little by little. With too little words yet starting with the most meaningful ones even if neither of them is sure what it's going to mean.
The connection between these two was build in the most tender way I was wrapped around their story. I was glued to my kindle, can't wait for things to finally unravel between these two and when they finally found their happiness together I was happy yet a bit worried. Some things felt off. Everything "seemed" perfect yet it wasn't because mental health isn't a simple thing, it needs to be managed and though Micah made a lot of progress he is still ill. There are still things, many things, he needs to be able to handle and he isn't three yet. He isn't ready. Also love isn't everything. It's the most beautiful and consuming thing but it's not enough. Sam can be there for Micah, for sure. But Micah needs to care for himself, to be responsible for his well being and not only trust in the beautiful relationship he was building with Sam.
I love the way Garrett not only brings difficult issues, like mental health, into her romance novels, but also brings them in a very realistic way. We all want the "Happily Ever After", that's why we are here.. But it's not that simply. WE are not that simply. No one's happiness is truly found in the arms of another, it's first needs to be found in ourselves.
If you've read "Lucky", Micah's name might ring a bell as he was briefly mentioned there, back when he was still playing soccer. Also Dom (the MC from that book) makes an appearance in this one.
~big sigh~ LOVED this one SO MUCH, can't recommend it enough. I miss Sam and Micah already..
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Rating:
★★★★★ |
E-Book
Edition |
210
pages
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Read on:
13 March 2020
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