"You can ask the universe for all the signs you want but ultimately, we see what we want to see when we're ready to see it"
In a way this sentence sums up the whole things. Sam and Luke have been neighbors and best friends for the past 7 years but it took a while away from one another and a bit of exploring for them to realize they already have much more. Seeing them getting closer and closer even if it was first an "experiment" was simply BEAUTIFUL. I can't remember when I read a sex scene that felt THAT tender. I'm sure they'll have more sporty sex in the future, but what they had in this one felt just right for the both of them, for what they are building together that compliments everything they already have.
That being said, let's get back to the beginning shall we? When Sam was 15 years old, not even his girlfriend Carole, gave birth to their son Jeremy. One silly night together without a condom and there you go.. Raising him together yet separably have been their life assignment yet they both feel somewhat inadequate, especially as he is turning the same year they made their mistake.. and they REALLY don't want him to make the same one..
Luke have been looking from the side and not really staying away from Sam and Jeremy who have been living next door to him for the past 7 years. They share so many great memories and traditions. Being together with them made him so happy, but he only realized just HOW MUCH while he was away a few months to help take care of his sick mother. Being away meant thinking about the two guys in his life, but mostly Sam. He always knew he was gay, he even dated briefly in the past but it never lasted and never made him want to be out of the closet but being away from Sam makes him take the plunge and confess to his family, and to everyone really. Well, expect for Sam (and Jeremy). It even gets worse when they find out Jeremy is gay..
Jeremy isn't really gay, he is faking it to try and lighten up his parents' restrictions towards him partying.. He can't get a GUY pregnant so.. Why not pretend his best friend is also his boyfriend.. It mostly works out, but in the end, his parents aren't THAT stupid.. But you know what, even though Jeremy WAS at times unreasonable and annoying, I liked getting his POV (and not just Sam and Luke). We got more about Sam and Luke though him, as well as more of Carole and what's going on with her. Both her and Sam are turning 30 this year and it's time for a little change..
Sam is FREAKING OUT about turning 30 which is why he made a list of things he SHOULD have done in his twenties and didn't get to do because he is too busy working like crazy as a waiter and taking care of his son. When he has two weeks left he realizes it's now or never.. But the list is GONE. Lucky he remembers what he actually wrote there...
Luke has the list and though it breaks his heart he wants to give Sam EVERYTHING, the things that are on the list but also everything else. He wants to make him happy. He wants to see a guy who can live and enjoy himself and not just run around in circles trying to make his life work enough for Jeremy to be taken care of.
Together they go through the list. Even the exploring a sexual taboo. That means exploring one another. Luke was second guessing himself at every turn it was a DREAM COME TRUE but it was also TORTURE. Sam was mostly confused. Everything with Luke felt so RIGHT but he kept the excuses because he just couldn't explain it to himself (Go Carole for explaining it THE BEST way ever). It took an effort from everyone but we did get our PERFECT Happily Ever After.
I'll end with a quote from the book:
"I want you to have everything I can give you" Luke says. "Everything you've never had and want"
2-3 May 2019