For Sam, times infinity by Suki Fleet

~sigh~ Beautiful. If you haven't read anything by Suki it's simply a must. There is something raw in her writing there is no way I'll be able to explain. But if you've read one of her books you'll know what I'm talking about. This feeling in your stomach he/they have been SO wronged and yet he/they are still here, trying, struggling, looking for a glimpse of happiness wherever it could be found. The is no fame and riches, no Prince or Princess, there isn't even a true promise of the kind of fairy-tale Happily Ever After, it's all about finding what's truly important in life - love, connection - and with those in hand finding their own happiness. It's so simply and exactly because of that - genuine. Money and fame won't ever make anyone happy but what Suki offers her characters will, even if their lives aren't "picture perfect" it's enough. It's a true lesson in humility.

This story is told from both our MCs - Sam and Evra, working together in a Balloon factory they somehow attract one another. Two quiet shy guys who wish for a little bit more than the simple life they are currently living - even if it seems impossible they'll be able to keep it. For Sam it's because he doesn't plan on staying for long and for Evra, well, you'll have to read this one to get his story... I won't spoiler it.



Sam has grown up in the system where he met the baby Tommy. He had an instant connection with the infant and from there on, they became a family. Now finally an adult he wishes to try and find work so he can support himself and Tommy but the only work his counselor finds him is almost 4 hours away by train. Yet he is determined to make as much money as he can to start building the future he has always envisioned. Tommy, now 13 years old and still in the same home they grew up in, misses him dearly, as much as Sam misses him back so it's up to him to find a better solution because this one isn't working and not only because he is quite miserable in his attempt on adulthood - his job, finding his own place and it's only the beginning.

A glimpse of happiness comes into Sam's life after he embarrasses himself in front of Evra yet somehow it does the opposite and Evra starts in a way courting him. Walking with him to work, sharing a meal. Simple things. Even though Sam has nothing to offer back he finds his way, even if it's just a pair of gloves in the "lost and found" section. Their friendship is sweet and innocent, contrasting with the whole world around them, cold and cruel.

It takes time before we learn of Evra's story and his strange connection with Maverick (a guy who also works at the factory with them). Mav sounds like a douche in the beginning, but once we get to know him we actually see a guy who also struggles with his own demons not being able to always do the right thing, and yet tries to right his wrongs whenever he can. No one is perfect, right? His life and Evra's have been intertwined for half of their lives and though they seem to be different their shared past as well as current state of living makes them the kind of "brothers, but not" as they put it. In a way similar to the relationship Sam shares with Tommy.

As Sam is finally in a situation to come back home (to Tommy), it's also a time for Evra to evaluate his life and make decisions. Lucky for him he has both Sam and Mav to help him navigate those. There are hard truths to be revealed, some he might have speculated, others he couldn't even imagine but in the end with the help of a larger support group they managed to form they are able to have true happiness, the most simply one - be able to hold each other close.

Heart breakingly beautiful. That's almost a promise when reading one of Suki's stories and this one delivers exactly that, always worth the wait for the next release ;)

Rating: ★★★★★

E-Book Edition

216 pages

Read on: 20-21 November 2019